No Compliance Committee
by Shadowgate
Summary: Do you hate school uniforms? If yes this is the story for you.
1. Chapter 1

No Compliance Committee

By Shadowgate

…

This is a sequel to The Jerks of the Board of Education and The Jerks Continue to Preach.

I wish to thank Colezilla and Coyote Smith for their input for this story.

…

It had been a month now since Stan Marsh was dealt an outrageous punishment. He and Principal Victoria got back on good terms though. Although Principal Victoria never told Stan Marsh she regretted putting him in ISS time went on.

Since a month had passed since the ISS and the Board of Education visiting well the kids thought all that was in the past.

But then one of the Board of Education Members who was romantically involved with Principal Victoria and got Stan in so much trouble to begin with sent an email to Principal Victoria which would lead to more drama.

…

8AM

Mister Garrison enters the classroom.

"Okay class today we're going to learn about" and then Mister Garrison was cut off by the intercom.

"Attention teachers and students. There will be an assembly during recess in the gym. It's mandatory that everyone attend."

Kyle said "awe there goes recess."

Stan asked out loud "what the hell could this assembly be about?"

Mister Garrison replied "you'll find out at recess now getting back to our lesson on menopause."

12:30 PM

Lunch ended and the teachers and staff gathered in the gym for the assembly.

The school board member whom Stan caught Principal Victoria having a relationship with was up on a stage with a bullhorn.

"We may very well be implementing mandatory school uniforms. Across America many are fed up with seeing pants half way down and t-shirts that have not been given approval by church ministers."

The board member pulled out kaki shorts and other school uniform type clothing.

Wendy stood up and said "THIS IS AMERICA WHY ON EARTH WOULD THIS BE IMPLEMENTED?"

The board member told her to go straight to the principal's office.

Stan was pissed off.

The whole recess period was spent with the board member discussing school uniforms.

He said it would come to a vote at the South Park Community Center in two weeks.

Stan caught up with Wendy out in the hallway. Wendy said she just sat in the office and nothing happened.

Stan said "well I'm ready to make something happen right now."

Stan and Wendy kiss and all of the sudden Mrs. Hubbard yells "EXCUSE ME! WHAT DO YOU ALL THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

Stan said "it's our business."

Mrs. Hubbard screamed "WELL I FOR ONE HOPE THE SCHOOL UNIFORM MEASURE GETS PASSED AND I'LL BE GLAD TO ENFORCE IT AND I'LL GLADLY TELL YOU RIGHT HERE YOU SHOULD NOT BE KISSING IN THE HALLWAY."

Stan said "you'll be glad to enforce it? You're not a teacher here."

Mrs. Hubbard said "well I'm applying to get my old job back. I used to teach here."

Stan remarked "well we really don't need you back."

Mrs. Hubbard shot Stan a dirty look and she headed into Principal Victoria's office.

Wendy said "if that bitch gets rehired school will be a nightmare."

Soon after Wendy said that Principal Victoria yelled "I'M NOT REHIRING YOU GET OUT OF MY OFFICE!"

Stan and Wendy both exhaled sighs of relief.

Back in class the kids were all pissed off because they lost their recess time.

Mister Garrison said "okay kids now that we're done listening to that loud mouth talk about dumb uniforms let's get back to learning about the history of sodomy."

After school Stan called Kenny and Kyle to say "I think now it's time to get political unless you guys want to be wearing those fucking school uniforms."

Kenny said "fuck that bullshit."

Kyle replied "30 percent of the country is going for it."

Cartman said "maybe more than that thanks to the commie Jews."

Kyle shot back "the Vatican endorses school uniforms."

Cartman said "well I'm sure motherfucking dirty kikes demand them as well."

Kyle said "shut your fucking mouth fat ass."

Out of nowhere Kyle's mom Shelia came and said "Kyle why are you cussing at your friend Eric Cartman?"

Kyle said "he cussed at me first."

Shelia asked "doesn't he have Tourette's Syndrome?"

Kyle answered "no that's just bullshit."

Shelia said to Kyle "well where are all you boys headed anyhow?"

Kyle said "we're going to start a club against the new school uniform measure."

Shelia said "oh now Kyle that's for grownups to vote on. What did I tell you about democracy Kyle?"

Kyle said "well of course I'll honor the votes for the President and stuff. Right now this is a local issue that affects us mom."

Shelia said "yes so the local adults get to vote on this issue."

Kyle said "now wait a minute children don't check their Constitutional Rights at the door of the school."

Shelia said "Kyle you're going to keep quiet about this school uniform issue and you need to stop cussing out your friends."

Kyle said "Cartman is not my friend and I can cuss him out anytime."

Shelia said "Kyle I am about to pull down your pants and spank you."

Kyle said "no you won't."

Shelia said "THAT'S IT" and then Kyle took off running.

He screamed as he ran and Shelia chased after him screaming just as loud.

Cartman yelled "HOLY SHIT" and Stan ran as well.

When Shelia caught Kyle she yanked his pants down and spanked him.

Shelia yelled "I TOLD YOU I COULD SPANK YOU BARE IN PUBLIC!"

Cartman commented "I'd fucking run to from Kyle's mom she's fucking bad."

Kyle was irritated and embarrassed.

Stan said "Mrs. Broflavski we are starting a "no compliance committee" and we'll stand against mandatory uniforms. America is a nation of liberty."

Stan stops at Taco Bell then he heads over to Wendy's house.

When he enters Wendy's house she sits down and plays "Every Rose has its Thorn" by Poison.

Stan and Wendy sit beside each other on their living room couch.

Stan says "Wendy it looks like with Kyle's mom being so gung ho on the school uniform issue we may have a major fight ahead of us."

Wendy replied "we must stand together like we have before."

To Be Continued


	2. Chapter 2

No Compliance Committee

By Shadowgate

Chapter 2

…

The children gathered at the community center.

Stan took the podium. Numerous other children attended.

"Alright everyone for those of you who don't know me I'm Stan Marsh and I've called this assembly. I am the leader of the 'No Compliance Committee' and we're here to stand against the plan of mandatory school uniforms."

Eric Cartman was standing beside Stan and he started giggling.

Stan turned to Cartman and asked "Cartman is there something funny you'd like to share with everyone?"

Cartman answered "I was watching an old show called Mister Ed last night and a woman went into a barn and found a man fucking a horse. It was so fucking funny."

All the kids laugh but Stan says "everyone get quiet. We're not here to talk about a man fucking a horse Goddamn it!"

Butters raised his hand and Stan called on him.

"Please don't talk about a man fucking a horse. If my parents find out I'm in an assembly where someone is talking about a man fucking a horse I'll get grounded."

Stan picked up the microphone and said "everyone tell Butters to shut up."

The whole audience says "shut up Butters."

Stan says "now everyone I wish to show a picture of the Constitution."

A picture of the Constitution on a poster board is put up.

Stan goes on "we are a land of liberty. Now they want to tell us what we can and cannot wear to school."

The audience gets riled up.

Craig Tucker raises his hand and Stan calls on him.

"Yes Craig?"

Craig asked "what if our parents vote in favor of it? We may not be able to a damn thing about it?"

Stan answered "we picket hard we might be able to sway our parents from voting in favor of it."

Butters raised his hand and when Stan called upon him

Butters said "if I hold a sign up that says 'no school uniforms' my parents might ground me for being rebellious."

Stan quickly commented "Butters you get grounded when the wind changes direction."

Butters started whining and Stan said into the microphone "everyone tell Butters to shut up Butters."

The whole audience says "shut up Butters."

Stan points out "the United States Supreme Court has ruled that students do not check their constitutional rights at the door."

Cartman farts in Kyle's face.

Kyle yelled "Goddamn it Cartman!"

Cartman yelled "LOOK EVERYONE I FARTED IN KYLE'S FACE."

The audience laughs and Stan yelled "CARTMAN KNOCK IT OFF!"

As Stan was about to continue his speech Kyle stood up and farted in Cartman's face.

"How the fuck do you like it fat ass?"

The whole audience laughed.

Stan yelled "BOTH OF YOU KNOCK IT OFF!"

As soon as Stan exhaled Kenny farted.

Kenny said "sorry Stan."

The audience laughed.

Stan stamped his foot and said "EVERYONE PAY ATTENTION!"

Stan went on to say "We have rights in America and we are sick and tired of being told that just because we're fucking children we can have no rights. I for one have had it with this communist board of education and that fucking bitch Mrs. Hubbard."

Token raised his hand and when Stan called on him he said "Mrs. Hubbard tried to get a job as a teacher but Principal Victoria told her no."

The rest of the audience cheered.

Stan said "Principal Victoria has been under pressure but she sure made a good decision there."

Cartman says "hey Stan I think Kyle will chicken out on protesting because his mom spanked him."

Kyle yelled "SHUT UP FAT ASS!"

Cartman yelled "DON'T CALL ME FAT YOU HOOK NOSED KIKE!"

Stan pulled both of them off the stage and told the audience to hold on.

Stan told them "both of you need to stop this behavior it's not helping the political goal."

Kyle said "I'm sorry Stan."

Cartman just giggled.

Stan told him to cut out the bullshit then they got back on the stage.

Craig yelled out "what's your plan since we can't vote? Do you just want to protest?"

Cartman answered "whatever we do Kyle's mom will spank him so he might chicken out."

Kyle said "I won't chicken out you fat fuck."

Butters chimed in "if I got spanked I would get grounded immediately afterwards."

Everyone stopped to look at Butters and then Butters said "I know, shut up Butters."

Clyde's cell phone rang and he answered it. He said "what's that Mister Stotch? You want Butters to come home immediately because he's grounded for jacking off in public? Oh okay I'll tell him."

Butters turned and said "Oh hamburgers I have to get home because I'm grounded."

After Butters ran out of the community center Clyde said "good job Craig for ringing my cell phone and Butters fell for it." Stan asked what they did and Craig explained that he rang Clyde's cell phone and it was him who called Clyde and not Butters dad. They said they planned the whole thing before the meeting on uniforms got started.

Stan yelled "WHY THE FUCK DID YOU ALL DO THAT?"

Clyde answered "well we were having so much fun bullying Butters to begin with and like I said we had it planned even before you started your meeting."

Stan yelled "COULD WE PLEASE FOCUS ON THE MOTHERFUCKING SCHOOL UNIFORM ISSUE?"

Counselor Mackey entered the community center and said "Attention students the vote has been taken on whether or not to have school uniforms in South Park. The majority of parents voted against the measure and it did not pass."

All the kids except Stan and Wendy ran out of the community center cheering.

Wendy walked up to Stan and said "good job Stan."

When she kissed him he replied "I feel like I didn't do shit."

THE END


End file.
